#448 Realization

I've come to my senses (I hope) that some people just don't change. I have this thing that I tend to think alot. Too much for my own good, actually. When someone told me who talked to them about me, my mind automatically go to the negative part instead of positive. I would have several questions replaying in my mind like;
what did that person said about me?
Did she talk bad behind my back?
What did she say?

I then get paranoid and such which pretty much annoys the hell out of me.

I lost my temper today. I was really tired and my friend kept on bugging me. I didn't drink coffee (smooth move) and I get irritated easily when I'm tired. She then snatched my phone away and I hate it. I bought my phone with my own cash and it's like a 4months baby that still needs to be secure. The fact that my friend snatched my phone away triggered my calm and coolness. I hate it! I admit that I swore, but I did it quietly, of course. I then tried to calm down and all which pretty much took out alot of energy. And it hit me. My temper isn't going no where. I should have control my temper more and to not show the other side of me I wish to hide. It's nothing bad but I find it not nice to... yeah.

Mr Singh's class felt a little bit longer than it usually does. Maybe it was because I'm tired or something, who knows. But at the end of today's lesson, he taught us secan and tangent thing. I admit, I felt mindfucked but it was alright in the end (: (: (:

Honestly, it's no use making excuse to make myself feel better when I know deep down that I'm in the wrong. Should keep my temper in place at all times (:

I walked passby a friend today and I said hi. It hurt me when my highschool friend didn't response to me. Maybe I didn't say it out loud enough to hear but she didn't even glance at my direction. I knew that something was wrong and personally, I don't really give a damn about it. If she's going to act that way, fine by me. Two can play that game. Only, I won't show it out (: and I don't intend to lose to someone like her.