Sunday, February 28, 2010

#87 Fate Is So Cruel



This will be the first and last time I'll post up a pink picture.
Anyways,
Why do I get the feeling that
Everyone is afraid to be my friend?
I just...
Don't know...

Tomorrow is a school day,
And I have no clue what will happen.
Oh wait,
Maybe I know half of it.
I will be left out.
D-uh.

Sometimes,
I wondered if I could just...
Be noticed for once.
Be loved,
Not popular,
But wanted.

But wishes like that don't come true.
Last year,
I used to think the worst is over,
And I was ready for something good to happen.
But the thing is,
I've expected too much.
Too much.
Instead,
There is more.
The worst has not end yet.
Or maybe it shall not.

Not to mention,
Why should I always explain myself to everyone?
Why can't they just shut up and not poke into other
People's business?

I have to go now,
I'm doing a present for a certain someone.

Wanted

Saturday, February 27, 2010

#86 Broken Promises



Remember the last time I blogged on my blog,
Saying that I will never ever walk to school anymore?
Well,
I walked to school few days ago, [Thursday 25/2/10]
Due to my lateness of waking up.
Anyways,
I started out for school at 7.30am,
Reached school at 8.00am,
Exactly 30minutes.

When I reached school,
I felt exhausted.
Blisters on both my heels
And I thank God that it was in the morning.
But even if it's in the morning,
It was about 26 degrees.
By the time I reached school,
My whole back was wet due to my heavy school bag.

The most disappointing thing when I reached school is when
None of my friends even have a slight bit of concern for me.
Without knowing,
My dad came to school to check if I'm alright.
Turns out that the clerk went to the chinese class,
They pointed out that I'm next door.
When the clerk went next door,
No one told the clerk anything.
Even if he asked them did I come.
None of them said anything.
At that time,
I went down to call my mom,
To inform her that I'm at school.

HAH!
What a laugh!
I now know that I have no friends at all.
Not on in my class.
Even when my dad asked me if I have any friends,
I had some difficulties answering him.
What should I say?
None, daddy,
I don't have any friends?

No one understands what I am going through now.
Mainly because everyone has friends and not me.
I asked myself every single day,
What the fuck is wrong with me?
What did I do to deserve such thing?
There isn't anyone to laugh or talked to.
There isn't anyone whom I can tell them my problems.
There isn't anyone whom can lend me a shoulder to cry on.
I promised myself that I won't cry over silly things like this,
But the thing is,
That I can't help it.
I can't help it.
I'm alone.
I'm all alone.

There is no one to turn too.
No one who will listen to me.
I'm blocked out.
I don't exist at all.
Somehow,
I feel like I don't belong in this world.
It's like I don't belong at all.

My family isn't there for me.
All I get from them is scolding.
They don't know what I am going through right now.
They don't know what kind of life I'm leading.

Like I said earlier on,
I don't belong.
My heart cannot cope all this things
Yet I have to put a face on to show everyone that I don't care.
I'm sorry,
I can't type anymore.
My tears are blurring the words on the keyboard.
And I do not want to cry anymore.
It will just make me think of more things in my life.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

Saturday, February 20, 2010

#85 Lifeless



I have a thing about this picture,
I'm not sure why.

School is gonna reopen in two days time.
In a way,
I thank a non existence God.
Because of school,
I don't have to see my stupid mother's face that often!

That's mean,
I know,
But who cares?
Everyday,
I wake up;
I get scolded,
Go to tuition;
Scold,
Come back from tuition;
Scold,
Before sleeping;
Scold.

My life is being invaded by her damn scoldings.
Why!?
Damn it,
Why!?

Anyways,
I just took a quiz on Facebook.
Its.. Kinda..
Secret?
Whatever,
I shall go now.

My life is being invaded by her scoldings

Friday, February 19, 2010

#84 If Life Is Meaningless, Does Death Have A Meaning?



That's how the sun sets looked like in Penang.
At that time,
I was left alone in my room,
Thinking of how sucky my life is.

And when I looked out of the window,
I felt better.
No,
I'm not saying that I cried or anything like that.
I just felt my heart went warm.
I felt...
Free...
Free from all the useless things around me.
Free from anger and sadness.
Free from the bitterness and hatred.
I felt,
Content.
I felt...
Happy,
For once.

Can you see the dark clouds rolling in?
I've realized,
No matter how hard the clouds tried to cover the sun,
The sun will always appear.
Always be there for the plants,
The flowers,
For people like me that needs hope.

Hope,
That's what the sun gave me when I looked at it.

I can see clearly now
When the rain is gone...

Hope

#83 Temper, Temper, Temper



I'm rather pissed off right now.
Thanks to that lovable mother I have!
She constantly befriended with me
And the next thing I know,
She's screaming her head off at me.
And all I can think was:
What the fuck!?

I mean,
Is she PMS-ing or something?
Or maybe it's the old age.
But I highly doubt that
Because other mothers aren't like her.
If I have a wish,
I would wish for a entirely different mother.
A mother that loves me and not a choosy mother.

A mother that understands me,
That listens to me,
That does not side anyone
Only merely gives out she thinks.
A mother that advices me softly
And not yell at me at all!

If only I have a mother like that
And not the cranky old woman that lives in this house right now.
Life would be a bit better.

What the fuck?

Thursday, February 18, 2010

#82 It's Not Over Until I Say It Is!



I've done thinking.
And the results is that I now have a story blog.
Go to
The Dreams Within

Anyways,
I've advised many people to not take my words seriously.
Even if it's a text message or an email.
It's too bad that you want it to mean something.
But clearly,
It meant another.

Like what Christ Daughtry sang,
It's not over!!!
And I agree with you, Christ,
It's not over.
Not until I said so!

It meant another

#81 Stories That Are Created From Dreams



Most people get their stories from dreams.
Which inspires them.
See Stephenie Mayer?
She got her idea of story from a dream.
With her dream,
It created Twilight.
Impressive eh?

Most of my stories are from my dreams too.
I like to record them down.
It's to remind me about..
Oh, I don't know,
My dream life?

I'm thinking of opening a blog
That contains only my stories/dreams.
Huh,
Maybe I should do that.
Still thinking about it though.

Anyways,
I've counted my ang pows.
Total of RM208.
The amount surprised me.
I mean,
I never get more than RM100
For quite a long time.
Maybe my luck is changing?
Who knows?

Still thinking.

#80 Screw You



I did not expect that picture to look...
Well...
Freaky,
But what to do?
After all,
I'm a freak.

Have you read,
A cup of cappuccino yet?
I bet you finally figured out that the title has nothing to
Do with the story.

Anyways,
During the Penang trip,
All my mother did was scold me.
What a bitch!
Now she is giving me the silent treatment.
Like that will do anything?
Except it'll be less noisy around here!
So what?
She gave me the silent treatment,
I gave HER the silent treatment.
Yay,
We gave each other the silent treatment.
That's low, mother.
That is really low.
Even for a human like you!

I don't understand.
Why does she always scold me and not my sister?
Even if she has done a lot of wrongs too?
Picky.
Picky picky picky picky!
That's what you are!
You prefer your eldest daughter.
Some bitch.

That's low

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

#79 A Cup Of Cappuccino?



"Aliens! Aliens!" A woman shouted somewhere in the mall.

I turned towards Yvonne, "I think she's drunk!" I said and we snickered.
Both of us, cousins of the same age, were at a shopping mall.
"Hey, Kim, let's go Giant, I wanna get something for someone." Yvonne said as she nudged me.
"Hmm.. Someone.." I whispered softly.
"It's for a friend!" She yelled.
I raised both hands up though I am surrendering to her,
"Okay, Okay. There's no need to shout!" I shouted.

We walked towards Giant.
I kept my eyes on the woman that shouted "Aliens, aliens,"
A couple of policemen got hold of her and wrestle her on the ground.
One of them put hand cuffs on her.
"Aliens! Aliens! They took my son! Help!" she cried.
I felt pity for her.
"Kim! Kim! Earth to Kimberly!" Yvonne said as she waved her hand infront of me.
"Huh? What?"
"Does these necklaces look gorgeous?"
"Hmm.. Yeah, sure."
"Okay, I think I'll have those." Yvonne said to the cashier.

Out of the blue,
The fire alarm rang.
Everyone looked stunned.
"Everybody please remain calm,
Please find the nearest exit and please exit the building,"
The speaker said.
Everyone started to crowd the exit.
"Kimberly! Kimberly! I can't see you!" Yvonne shouted across the sea of humans.
"I'm here! I'm over here!" I screamed.
"Meet you outside!"
"What!?"
And I saw Yvonne walked outside.
I tried walking towards her but the people kept pushing me
Further and further away from her.
I realized something was wrong.
Is it me or is the door way getting lower and lower?
I thought.
The door is shutting itself!
I was stunned and I couldn't move at all.
"Get away from the door! It's closing in!" I yelled.

The gap was small.
Only a child at about the age 5 could go through.
"Out of my way, bitch!" A man said as he pushed me aside.
The impact was too much,
I started to fall down.
Suddenly, a pair of strong hands held onto me.
I looked up and saw man at the age of 18 caught me.
I tore my eyes away from his and saw the fat man trying to go through.
"No wait!" I screamed and got up.
I started to run towards him.
"Wait! You can't! Stop!"
The gap was too small,
He won't cross in time!
I rushed towards him but someone was holding me back.
"No, you can't save him." A gentle voice said.
I've seen these a thousand times.
As the fat man tries to roll to the other side,
His tummy was too big and he was facing upwards.
I saw his eyes widen and he screamed as the door started to crush him.
I jerked my hand away from the person holding it.
That's what you get for not listening. I thought.

Blood splattered all over the floor
And the fat man was no longer in one piece.
A child started to cry and a mother shushed him.
"There is no fire," I whispered.
"What?" The person asked me.
"There is no fire!" I said louder.
Everyone looked at me.
"What do you mean by there is no fire?" Someone asked.
"Yes, Kim, what do you mean by there's no fire?" The person repeated.
How does he know my name? He.. looked familiar..
"Leon?" I asked and faced towards him.
"Yes, Kim, I was surprised you don't recognize me." he said and smiled.
I hugged him tightly.
I've missed him so.
"Excuse me, young lady, you said that there isn't any fire,"
A woman whom is holding a 5 year old child asked me.
Reality sets in.
"There isn't any fire. I don't smell smoke nor see any.
I don't feel hot and the water sprinkles are not on."
I pointed out.
"She's right!" A man at about 30years old said and walked towards me.
"My name is Jasper and I think you're right,"
I shacked his extended hand and told him my name.
I looked around and saw about 8 people is still here,
Trapped including me.

"Okay, listen up, we have to find a way to escape from this place."
I said loudly.
"Does anyone have a map here?" Leon said.
"I do!" A girl at about 13 said and she took out a piece of paper.
She then shyly handed Leon the map.
"Thanks," Leon muttered and turned his back towards her as he faced me.
"Leon, there's a fire escape here," I said as I pointed the map.
"There is about 5 fire escapes,"
"Yes, and I thin-" I stopped in mid sentence.
"Kim, whats wrong?"
"Shh... Do you hear that?
"No, Kim, you're starting to scare-"
"Listen!" I hissed.
Leon looked at me.
"It sounded like someone is using their nails to scratch the blackboard."
"Exactly,"

"Everyone quiet down!" Leon shouted.
All five of them, excluding the sleeping baby, looked at us.
I scanned around the room.
Two policemen, the mother and child, Jasper and the 13 year old girl
All looked at us with wide eyes.
A shrill sound sounded as though it's on top of us.
"Where-" Jasper started to say before I shushed him.
I have a bad feeling about this.
Leon looked at me.
"The air vent!" We both gasped.

"Grab whatever you can!" Leon shouted.
"What is it?!" The 13 year old girl asked Leon.
"I don't kno-" Leon begun to answer when
One of the policeman was dragged up to the ceiling.
"Ahhh!!!!" He screamed.
In a few minutes later,
He stopped screaming.
I curiously walked towards him.
"Kim!" Leon hissed,
"Get your ass back here!"
I ignored him and continued.
The hole in the air vent was much bigger than I expected.
Blood trickled down,
Making a small puddle on the floor.

My breathing became irregular.
My heart is pounding real hard in my chest.
Just a few more steps.
Suddenly,
The body of the policeman fell on the floor in front of me.
Fuck.
Was all I could think.
"Turn the kid away!" I yelled at Leon without leaving my eyes
From the policeman.
Or rather,
Headless policeman.

"Damn," Leon said when he reached by my side.
I stepped over the policeman and looked through the hole.
Scratch marks...
"Who ever nails are those,
They really need a manicure, badly," Leon joked.
I bend down and searched the policeman's jacket.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Leon asked me.
Finally,
I produced a flashlight and two guns which are fully loaded.
I tossed one of the gun towards Leon.
"We might need these."
"What happened to him!?" The woman with the baby screamed.
Instantly,
The baby started to cry loudly,
His voice echoed the whole place.

"Shut that baby up!" I yelled over the cries.
Instantly,
The cry became a soft whimper.
"First of all,
Everyone must not stand right under the air vent,
Secondly,
Take as many weapon as you can to defend yourself.
Thirdly,
To survive,
You all must stay togather.
Got it?!" Leon said like a true leader.
Everyone mutely went to do what they are supposed too.

"That's a great speech,
But what about the kid and the baby?" I pointed out.
"The mother has to protect it like a true mother.
The kid, I can protect her if I must.
But, she can take care of herself."
"Oh."
Suddenly,
My cell phone rang.
I checked the speaker and saw it's Yvonne.
"Hey! Where are you?" She said.
"I'm stuck in Giant."
"What!? Apparently there is no fire,"
"Tell me something I don't know!"
"The F.B.I's here won't tell me anything!"
A growl came right on top of me.
"Look, I have to go." I said while looking on top of me.
I snapped my phone shut and put it into my pocket.
I pushed Leon a side as a slimy tail tried to reach out for me.

"Everyone! Shush!" Leon tried to say as loudly as he dared.
Slowly,
A head was lowered from the whole.
The screaming woman was right.
There was, no, there is an alien in the building.
The alien has no eyes and nostrils.
All it has was a pair of ears that are like foxes'
And a mouth the size of a hippopotamus'.
It's blackish brown in color and it has a human body
But it's arms are longer than it's legs like an apes'.
And it's legs looks like it's build for running from a predator
Or rather towards a prey.
It's saliva is dripping on me and I shivered.
I felt like screaming but I couldn't.
Leon slowly climbed on top of me to protect me.
His eyes were on the creature all the time.
The alien withdraw it's head.
It sense nothing here...
Suddenly a phone rang.

The alien jumped down from the hole.
Instead of carrying Leon off me and take me away,
It ran on all fours towards the ringing phone
Which was on the other policeman.
"Ahhh!" He screamed and tried running away.
I tried to get up to help him but I couldn't.
Leon wouldn't let me.
Instead,
I sat back and watch an innocent guy died.
The policeman tripped on his shoe lace and fell.
"N-!" I wanted to shout but Leon put his hand over my mouth.
The alien sprang on top of the policeman,
Tore his head of from his body,
And with a single gulp,
The head vanished in the alien's mouth.
The alien blindly retraced it's step and got back into the air vent.
The scampering sounds in the air vent sounded far away,
The alien had clearly ran away to find more victims.
I could still hear it happily munching on the wide eyed head
While blood kept on dripping in front of me.

Slowly,
Leon got off me and held out a hand towards me to help me up.
I couldn't.
I can't.
I was too shocked.
The gun skidded in front of me as I pushed Leon just now.
I reached out and took the gun.
"Hey, hey," Leon said quietly as he tried to get me up on my feet.
"It's gone." He smoothed down my hair.
I stood up.
"What the hell was that!" Jasper shouted.
"Shut up!" I said as loudly as I dared.
Jasper looked at me,
His hair was all over his head.
"Everyone now gathered around here.
But first, shut your phone up." I said as I put mine on silent.
Everyone, except the baby, whipped out their phones.
"Okay," I whispered.
"What the hell was that?" Jasper said, this time he whispered.
"An alien," Leon said, emotionless.
"Fuck that! There is no such thing as an alien!"
Jasper shouted.
Leon got hold of Jasper's collars and held him up.
Jasper made choking sounds as his legs dangled in the air.
"Shout one more time,
I'll tie you up and leave you under the hole for that thing to eat you up!"
Leon growled softly.
Jasper nodded,
Clearly understood Leon.
He dropped Jasper on the ground.
"Go on, Kimberly." Leon said.

"That's an alien." I continued.
"There aren't any eyes or nostril on that thing.
So I suspect it moves by sound.
Judging by the sound in the air vent,
The alien isn't here anymore.
I think you all did a great job,
By not moving and screaming." I said and smiled.
"So what do we have to do now?" The 13 year old girl asked.
"We split up,
Find weapons and meet back here in 5minutes,
Any longer, we will assumed you're dead and moved on
To find an escape route.
Go it?" Leon said, with full authority in his voice.
"Now go!"

Every one scattered to find weapons.
Leon went over the recently dead body and took out a pair of gun.
He tossed of on the guns and tossed it towards me
He then mouthed a word, thanks.
Leon walked towards me.
"It's been a long time." I said and hugged him again.
"Yeah," And he hugged me back.
His arms are like towels,
Wrapped tightly around me,
Making me feel warm and comfortable.
"I missed you so," I said,
Burying my head in his shoulder blade.
"Ahem," Someone's throat was cleared.
Damn it!
I let go off Leon and looked at the interrupter.
The 13 year old girl stood there,
Holding a water gun without water contained in it.
"My name is Crystal," she said, eying both of us.
I felt heat rushing in my cheeks.
"What is contained in your uh, water gun?" Leon asked.
"Tomato sauce," Crystal said, brightly.
"It's uh, 5 minutes already and everyone is ready."
"Right, 1,2,3,4..." Leon counted, including ourselves.

"Where's the mother and child!" I said, looking around.
"I don't know! Crystal said.
"Jasper?"
"I wasn't keeping my eyes on them,"
"They must have wandered further away," Leon said.
"We have to find them!" I said and started to walk
Towards the toy department but Leon stopped me.
"Look," he said as he point at the ceiling.
Slurping loudly,
A woman's body was dangling in air.
Blood was trickling down her shoes
And she fell,
Body first because her head was gone.

I felt like puking.
So many people died and it's not even a day's time.
Oh, God.
Leon steadied me and he gripped my hands tightly.
The alien jumped down,
Ear twitching,
Waiting for someone to make a sound.
I held my breath,
Terrified the alien could heard my pounding heart.
More pounding sounds came from the air vent.
More aliens?
A long slender hand reached out,
Followed by a long slender leg.
Finally, it's head was lowered.
Eyes that are wide enough reflected me image.
Oh, fuck.

It's hand reached out.
Each hand contains 3 fingers.
Suddenly,
A voice in my mind hissed,
"Humansssss,"
I figured out it's the alien's voice
For it doesn't have any mouth.
Just a pair of freakishly huge eyes and to slits for a nose.
"W-what do you want from us," I said,
Taking my chances.
The black alien took a step forward towards me
But it was held back by the huge eyed alien.
It made twittering sounds like a bird.
Instantly the black alien stopped and sat down.

"Humansss" The voice hissed again.
"Earth... Mine!" He scrunched up his hands into a fist.
Funny how aliens always want to conquer Earth.
I mean,
What is so special about Earth?
It's nothing but a big blue and green ball!
"Girl... Mine!" It hissed again
And this time he pointed at me.
What the hell?
Leon stepped in front of me,
Protecting me from the alien.
"Go back to your home planet!" Leon shouted.
"There is nothing for you to conquer here!"
"Girl..."
"This girl belongs to me,"
He said me, not Earth!
"She stays here!"
More twittering sounds.
The black alien got up.
"No! Wait!" I screamed and pushed myself in front of Leon.
"What the hell are you doing?" He whispered.
"I'm trying to not let yourself get killed," I whispered to Leon
To the alien I said,
"Take me but leave my friends alone!"
"Earth..."
"Earth will never be yours!"
The alien hesitate.
"Follow... Me... Earth... Friends... Unharmed,"
I figured the alien is trying to say,
"Follow me and Earth and your friends will stay unharmed,"
I nodded and started walking towards the aliens.
Leon reached out and took my hand.
"Let me go!" I said, looking in his eyes.
"Not without a fight!" he said and pointed the gun at the black alien.
"Leon, NO!"
The gun gave out a loud bang.
The black alien got hit.
Instead of being hurt,
The alien growled and ran towards us.

The skin...
The skin must have been made out of hard shell.
There's no way to stop it.
We're all going to die.
Leon grabbed hold of me and ran.
"Hit it! Hit it with everything you got!" Leon screamed.
Leon pushed me towards the ground and took out his guns.
Bang! Bang!
Went the bullets.
I finally came to my senses.
I ran towards the gas department,
Took a lighter and a gas tank.

I took out my gun and looked for the black alien.
I gasped when I saw Leon wrestling with it.
"Hey! Hey! Over here! Hey!" I screamed and shoot the alien with my guns.
The black alien raised it's head and it's ear twitched.
"Over here! Hey! Over here!"
The black alien rushed towards me.
It clearly forgotten about Leon.
That's good.
That's really good.
The alien snarled.
Closer.
Closer.
Closer.
I pulled the pin out of the gas tank.
A little bit more.
I clicked the lighter,
Fire flare up.
NOW!
I put the lighter in front of the gas tank.
Causing the gas in the tank to lit up.
The alien was on fire.
But instead of stopping,
It continued running towards me.

I ditched the gas tank and shot it with my gun.
I quickly ran for cover when the tank explode.
I screamed when my arm was burnt.
The sprinkles turned on,
Putting out the fire everywhere.
I whimpered,
The pain in my arm hurts a lot.
I saw a pair of pale legs in front of me.
Shit!
I looked up and saw a pair of huge eyes reflected my image.
With one long arm,
The alien hold my collar and held me up,
"Kimberly!"
Someone from somewhere shouted.
Leon...
I blacked out.

How could Leon be so selfish to keep me?
I mean,
I'd rather die to save Earth and a million of lives,
Yet Leon wants to keep me and endanger everyone's life?
That is so selfish of him!
Leon,
Don't be a hero and just save your ass and everyone's too.
Leon,
I-
I felt warm arms around me.
It seems so familiar.
The warmness I mean.
I felt water droplets on my face too.
What does this mean?
That it's raining in the mall?
I open my eyes
And saw Leon crying.

I reached out and touched his face,
"Hey,"
Leon opened his eyes and he hugged me tightly.
"You're alright! You're alright!"
"Yeah, but my arm hurts."
Leon took my arm and examine it.
"It's badly burnt. You need a doctor,"
"Leon, I..."
I couldn't finished my sentence.
The alien pushed Leon a side and carried me to it's space ship.
Wait!
There's a damn space ship in here?!
The space ship is as big as a hut.
Oh my God!
I struggled.
"Kim!" Leon screamed and tried to rescue me.
"Leon!"
I tried kicking, biting, hitting but nothing works.
"Boy... Will... Die... Hurt... Me..."
I think he said,
"Boy will die if he hurts me,"
As in me, the alien.
"Let me go,
I will not run.
Just let me say goodbye," I said to the alien.
The alien lower me to the floor so I can stand.
"Leon, stop!" Tears trickling down my face.
This will be the last time I will be able to see his face,
"Leon, please, don't be a fool!
I'd rather die knowing that I've saved you,
I've saved the whole world.
My life is only one,
It's small compared to the millions of people in the world."
I chocked.
"Leon, I l-"
The alien pulled me towards it's space ship.
I think it wants me to stop talking.
Jasper was holding Leon back saying,
"There's nothing you can do!
She's as good as dead"

The alien lay me down on a mattress.
What does it want from me?
My heart pounding,
Butterflies are fluttering in my stomach,
Tears non stop flowing in my eyes.
"Ah!" I screamed when I felt a stabbed in my heart.
"Girl... Dying!" The alien shrieked.
"Must... Save... Experiment!"
It's using me as an experiment?
It wants me to be alive so its could do experiments on me!?
I turned my head and saw a pair of sharp scissors.
I used all my strength and plunged the scissors in my heart.
The pain increase.
The alien screamed.
I closed my eyes and all I saw was Leon smiling down at me.
I felt Leon's warm hands around me.
My heart started to decreased it's pumping.
I remembered touching Leon's face,
His tears upon me.
I remembered hugging him closely.
I remembered I wanted to tell him something important.
I remembered I wanted to say that I love him.
I remember..
I remember..
I remember..
I-

Darkness sets in

#78 None Of Your Business



That's creme brule.
I'm not sure how to spell it but whatever.
Anyways,
Both my cousin and sister aren't here right now.
They went to KFC,
Which is opposite the hotel to eat.
Right now I'm all alone,
Because I don't feel like going out.

As the blog title said,
None of this things are your damn business.
Why must you add yourself in,
Even though you care for her?
She's big enough to fight her on battles.
Even if you care about her,
Why don't you go to her house and offer her tissues?
As I said,
None of your business!

You said whenever the situation got worst,
I don't fucking reply?
That is BULLSHIT!
I have alot of comebacks,
Most of them are hurtful.
Do you want me to hurt her more than she already is?
There's a word called,
THINKING!
Oh puh-lese,
I don't back down easily.
You are just another busybody!
If she asks you to
'Talk some sense into me',
That's a whole different fucking situation!

I know what you told you sister.
Your sister told my sister and my sister told me.
I'm just being nice enough not to tell anyone.
Heed my words,
Don't EVER be a busybody.
No one likes busybodies.

Now,
For a happier situation.
Hmm...
Let me think,
THERE'S NONE!

Oh,
And one more thing,
Don't take me words to harshly,
Most of them don't mean anything.

No one likes a busybody

Monday, February 15, 2010

#77 Wrong, Wrong, Wrong, Wrong!



Because I have no one to turn to,
I went to my cousin.
I let her read my messegers,
Asking her for advice,
She told me,
"She sure can write essays!"

Anyways,
You demanded me to answer your question.
How in the damn world do you want me to say it?
Right now I feel like I'm fighting a losing war
And I hate to lose.

Why can't you just forget this damn thing?
I'm trying my best to forget about it
But you kept on bringing it up.
Sending me ultra long messeges.

You said I kept on saying that you're backstabbing me.
How could you say that!?
Of all things!

Those were the past.
Yes,
I know I kept on digging up the past.
But,
That is the way I want to remember things.
And if you don't like what I wrote in my blog,
You can always don't go!

You kept telling me that you admit that you were wrong.
Are you trying to say that I'm not?
Are you trying to say that I think I'm not wrong
Even if I am?
Is that what are you trying to say?
That I'm always in the wrong?

Okay,
Listen everyone!
I'm wrong!
I'm always wrong!
Whatever I say
I'm wrong!
I'm wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong!!!

What do you know?
I've admitted I'm wrong in
EVERYTHING!

You told me that I can answer your question later.
Right now,
I'm waiting for later.
And everytime later comes by,
Later said..
Later.

I'm wrong in everything!

#76 Penang


I've should have known.
Penang is so damn boring.
My cousin and sister went to the swimming pool
To swim right now.
But since I've hated swimming,
I'm sitting this one out.

Anyways,
Penang is so boring.
I can pratically sleep right now.
The whole morning I've been left out.
Oh, damn this whole place.
Not to mention,
The temperature here is extreme.
Either very hot,
Or very cold.
I'm having both flu and rashes right now.
Ah,
I hate it here.
I should have stayed at home.
Anyways,
I went to see my niece and nephew yesterday.
They were ultra cute!
At first they were asleep until my nephew came out.
I then went in to see my niece,
She was still asleep,
And after a few seconds,
She woke up and she saw me.
She reached out her hands and said
"Jie jie!"
I carried her.
In my whole life,
I was never called Jie Jie.
I felt happy.

Anyways,
We played really lousy fire crackers at my aunt's house.
It was fun?
Not to mention hot.
Enjoy this phtos!




Regretted coming to Penang.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

#75 Failure



The experiment 2010 was a failure.
I feel so sad.
So instead of wasting a good mandarin orange,
I decided to make it int fruit juice!
I washed me hands
And used my hands and squeezed all the juice out.
It may sound gross but hey!
It's fun!
I can feel the seeds popping from my hand and into the cup.
Yumm...

Anyways,
I've got to go now.
Have to pack my bag to go to Penang tomorrow!
We're going to stay in a hotel yo!
I can't wait!
Not only that,
I've been using the computer since this morning,
7am.
My eyes are threatening to pop out of their sockets
Any moment now!
So yeah,
I've got to go.
Ciao!

Going to Penang tomorrow!

#74 Earphones











Yes,
Dear blog readers,
Those are the earphones I have been talking about.
Let me rephrase how much it costs again
Rm70.
Yes,
Gasp.
I nearly fainted after hearing how much it was!
Lol,
From today onwards,
I think I will not bring my MP4 to school
If I can help it!

RM70

#73 Experiment 2010



Okay,
I took that picture for fun
And plus, my lips were dry at that time.
Heh.

Anyways,
I'm going to have an experiment in my own house!
You can do it too!

The things required are,
-An orange/Mandarin orange
-Freezer
-Hands and legs
-Strength
-Chopstick
-Straw [the one that you can suck with]

Okay,
First you have to take an orange or mandarin orange
Or what ever.
Then,
You put the fruit in your freezer,
Wait for 4-5 hours,
Take it out,
Use your strength to throw the fruit on the ground.
Careful not to throw so hard or the skin will break.
Use your chopstick and
Drill a hole in your fruit,
Put a straw and suck up all the contents.

And that,
My dear readers,
Is one of a hell cool fruit without
You washing your cups or whatever!
Try it,
You'll like it.
I promised!
[I think]

An experiment in my own house!

#72 To My Blog Chatters



Hmm,
Lets see.
I shall start talking to one of the blog chatters,
-
Yeah,
That's the name.
Okay -,
Imagine if you're in my position.
No one wanted to be friends with you.
No one wants to have anything to do with you.
You feel lonely constantly.
It's like a shell,
Empty in the inside but hard on the outside.
But the thing is,
You've learn something that makes you feel better.
And that's the I-don't-care attitude.
But one day,
A person came along and started making friends with you.
Duh,
You'll feel happy,
You though you'll never feel empty again.
But you don't know how wrong you are!

You constantly get in to fights with her.
Every year she seem to change.
Sometimes,
You wish she would have gone back to the same person
You once knew!
All of a sudden,
Something snapped in you.
You have put up so many things!
You tried to be happy for her when you feel bitter.
What other people say,
That I always show my emotions
Are entirely wrong.
Those emotions are used to cover up
The ones hidden under.

Anyways,
As I said,
Something snapped inside you.
You can't hold back anymore.
Every time you see her,
You feel like screaming or hurting her
Because you feel very angry.
So the only option left is to ignore her.
But every time you see her you feel angry
Not to mention sad.

She tried to make everything back the way it was.
But she has no clue what she did wrong.
She got angry at you just because you went recess with other people.
But the thing is,
The first week of school,
You've waited for her after school
But she left without telling you
And you spot her walking away with her other friends.
Tell me
Now,
Tell me how would you feel!?
I tell you how would I feel,
I felt angry,
Hatred,
Ditched!

And one day,
She wrote on her blog
Which COMPLETELY embarrass you.
She said,
She made friends with you because she pitied you!
In my point of view,
It's like she pitied a stray puppy,
Took it in because it was so cute!
Took care of it,
Love it
And one day,
The dog grew up into something
Not many people expected.
It was UGLY!
She decided to abandon the poor dog
Because her friend gave her a better dog.
She replaced that poor dog.
Thew it a side,
And let it live it's own life,
Thinking
Why!?

Pitying a begger is a completely different situation.
Yes,
Sometimes I feel like I don 't need anybody's pity.
To me,
It felt like I've lost
And I cannot cope losing.
And that, -,
Is how I feel.

To Ily,
Personally,
I felt happy that someone FINALLY side me.
I took your advice and tried talking to other people
But it seems like they don't quite understand me like you do.
No offense Marissa,
But I felt happy that someone stood up for me.
I felt happy knowing that I could finally talk to someone
Who really understands me.
Marissa,
You have a loving mother,
You can talk to her about everything,
Do you really think I have the same kind of mom?
My mother would just scold me!
I took your advice Ily,
I tried talking to my mother.
We joked but it seems,
Everytime I tried talking to her about my problems,
She won't listen to me,
If she does,
She would scold me.
So I figured,
I have to keep everything to myself.
And yet,
It hurts so much!
But then again,
I've redevelop the
I-don't-care-attitude.
And now,
I constantly think of walls that surrounds me.
And,
Dear Ily,
I have a special request,
I would like to know more about you.
More than just an adviser
I would like to know you as a friend.

Marissa,
You were always the golden girl.
The girl with talents.
Like I always said,
I'm darn jealous of you.
You get attention everywhere.
You get people's trust!
People's love and much more.
I remembered you last told me
That day you 'ditched' me at Genting
About the room thing.
You told me that you're 'giving me time to think'.
What is there to think about?
Aside from how lonely I am.
Have you not notice I was depressed everytime?
Someone told me that you told that someone
That I was faking to be sick
So I could get more attention!?
As a friend,
I wondered how could you do that to me?
To think like that!
It really shocked me!

I was really having pain,
Physically and mentally.
I tried having conversations with you
But it never really worked out.
It's because he's always there!
Don't you feel embarrass after what you and him done
When we reached at the hotel room?
I was utterly shocked!
You thought I couldn't hear it.
But I did.
I did.
That night,
I've stayed up until 4am,
So you can come in.
I thought,
Hey, when she comes in,
We could talk about today.
But it turned out
Without even a text message,
You have slept with your friend.
You have utterly no idea how I felt.

Yes,
I was tempted to take your bags out and
Ask you to go to your friend's room.
But I thought that would have made the
Situation worst.
So I calmed down.
And ignore the pain that ache my whole body.

When school re-opens,
I thought hey,
Maybe things will go differently,
After all,
A new year,
A new beginning.
HAH!
Turns out
The new beginning has worsen.
I was smashed when I heard you walked away
With your friend after school,
Leaving me behind.
From that day onwards,
I've been walking to the bus lebai alone.
But, hey that's no biggy.
I'm a big girl,
And these kind of things don't affect me.
I think...

And when Jesslyn asked me to go recess with her,
I told her hold on,
We should wait for you
But you were taking so long,
And I started to feel pain,
Could be gastric.
So I said,
Lets go,
They will catch up on us later.
And I thought
You will come to the table.

Personally,
Is it because Jesslyn went recess with me
Makes you angry?
Or is it the fact that we 'ditched' you?
Hey,
You got angry at me leaving you,
Imagine if I left you every single day after school?
How would you feel?
And you're not even accompanied by anyone!
Don't take this too personally.
I'm just letting everything I feel out.
That's what blogs are for right?
Let everything out...

Happy that someone finally side me

Friday, February 12, 2010

#71 Earphones That Costs RM70!



Damn,
Too dark to see.
My sister helped me buy another pair of earphones.
You have no idea how much it is!
It's RM70!
I was like...
WHAT THE FFFF----!
70 FREAKING BUCKS!

Ah..
But what to do?
It's my own fault that my earphones were taken away.
Personally,
I don't like my old earphones.
Hmm...
Maybe I can fork out some cash from my dad
And give him the
I'm so poor, please help me look.
COOLIO!
Currently at episode 182 in Naruto.
A few more episodes to go!
Oh,
Not to mention,
I've done downloading Resident Evil Regeneration.
It's like Resident Evil but it's in anime form.
I think I'm in love with anime right now.

Oh no!
I don't wanna be an anime freak!
Not to mention lala!
Ah!
But who cares right?
I mean
Who cares I'm an anime freak!?
As long as I'm not lala!

Will post up the earphones later.
Have to finish watching my Naruto episodes first
Then camwhore with my new baby earphones.
Ciao ya'll!

Coolio!

#70 Ticked Off



I got real bored yesterday and I've decided,
Hmmm...
I think I should cam whore.
And I did.

I've a nice long chat with her yesterday
And I feel content,
Knowing what I did 'wrong'.
Turns out,
It was all a misunderstanding.

Today,
My school had a Chinese new year celebration.
It was..
Okay I guess.
Anyways,
Towards the end of the school,
About like, 30minutes left,
They had spot check
Because one of the stupid ass prefect lose the keys
To the prefect room!
IDIOT!

They took my earphones because I was careless
And left it in my drawer.
I cried due to frustration
And I was angry at myself for being so careless.

But most of all,
I blamed the prefect who suggested to have spot check.
I cursed him!
Cursed him!
I hope from now on,
He'll have a miserable life!

It was all a misunderstanding

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

#69 Sound Of Pain



First of all,
I hate that number very much.
69.
It's ultra sick!
If you don't know what I mean,
Nevermind.

Anyways,
Just when my problems ended,
It started all over again!
It's s tiring to have problems all the time!

School today was...
Okay?
I guess.
Endless of homework
Are stacking themselves up on my table.
Stupid tuitions!

Right now I'm waiting for my dear
Naruto episodes to load.
Ciao!

Endless of homework

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

#68 Braces!?



Yes, my dear fellow blog readers,
No more braces!
I feel..
Happy!

Took it out yesterday,
It kinda hurts when the dentist scrapped out the glue.
Other than that,
I feel fine.

I've received word that
Someone is angry at me for what I've said.
The thing is,
I did not know what did I say to make that person angry.
I tried talking to her
But instead,
It's been pushed from day to day.

I got pissed off.
It's because I want to know what did I said
To make them angry!?

Anyways,
I shouldn't let these kind of things effect me.
But they are my friends!
I don't care!
I shall talk to her tomorrow if it kills me to do so.

No more braces!

Sunday, February 7, 2010

#67 Sky And Sea



Ups and downs.
Lefts and rights.
Black and white?

They are total opposites.
Just like me and you?

I'm thinking of writing a story.
I'm not sure what,
But I have a fairly good idea.
You have to see me if you wanna read it.
Hahaaa...

I've dug out my last year's diary.
So many stories.
So many sad occasions.
This year,
I promised myself.
I promised.

I will not,
Never
Ever
Forever
Cry over things again.

I will not,
Cry over friends,
Parents
Or even animals.

I shall,
And will
Be tough.

I promised myself

#66 Clouds



Clouds,
There are rainy clouds,
Sunny clouds,
And even thunder clouds.

Why must life be like a cloud?
It's like your destiny to become like this.
Every single cloud must follow the direction of the wind,
And follow it's flow.
Why can't the clouds just go where they want to?

Anyways,
My mom knows that I'm going to get a camera next.
By using my own savings.
Well, D-uh!
I've used my saving for most of my things.
Clothes,
Books,
Handphone,
MP4..
Ect.

Um..
Maybe I shall use my Chinese New Year ang pow.
Hmmm....

This CNY,
My dad booked us two hotel room!
He said he wanted to enjoy while being in Penang!
Finally!
I think it's a five star hotel!
I can't wait yo!

Accounts tuition yesterday was boring.
My old primary school friend was there.
I couldn't recognize him at first.
And when he told me he's in the same tuition as me,
I freaked!

Haha,
But it's cool to see your old friend back.
Anyways,
I shall now go and check what digital cameras are cool.
Not to mention cheap!
Yo!

Kaze ga fuite aa itai kienai omoi
As the wind blows,
These painful memories won't dissapear

Saturday, February 6, 2010

#65 Pass Couple Weeks



I haven been blogging for quite a long time.
Mainly it's because I'm rather lazy.
Anyways,
I've finally got my new MP4.
Yes,
Not an Ipod,
But the second best.





Anyways,
For the past few weeks,
I have not understand anything.
Now I know.
I know that no one in this world is an angel.
And there isn't anything as an 'Angel'.

Oh,
Actually,
Today is a school day yet I did not go to school.
Mainly because I'm very tired
And I haven done my accounts tuition homework!
Gah!
Have to do homework after watching Naruto
Hehehehe...

Oh,
News update,
6 people from my class went to Daisy
And Aaron [from Daisy] came down to my class.
No offense Aaron,
But it's kinda embarrassing!

As usual,
School's bloody boring,
Not to mention there's NO HOMEWORK!
Yeah,
That's one thing I love about my class.
Teachers rarely gives us homework.

OH MY HOLY SHIT!
I haven done my Moral essay...yet.
There's alot of tuition homework.
Have to get started yo!



I have my eyes on a specific MP4 cover!

Rarely gives us homework